reflection

Ballerina, Fireman, Astronaut, Moviestar

Did you grow up to be what you thought you would?

When I was little I remember dressing up as a lawyer for our Halloween costume parade at school. I was certain that was what I wanted to be when I grew up. Lots of kids thought it was silly. That didn’t matter to me. In my heart I knew that was what I was going to be. Boy was I wrong.

I had kids and therefore I became not only a lawyer who can argue till she’s blue in the face, but also a doctor, a chef, and everything else you could possibly think of.

All my training in ballet and other forms of dance have long since been put to bed, though I do still dream about the classes that I took way back when.

These days I only sing in the shower, when at one time I was offered a recording contract. My audience is my Layla, my kids when they are paying attention, my husband when he’s home and at times a group of drunk people at karaoke (although it’s been years since I’ve gone).

Do I miss it? The dream of being lawyer was short lived, so no I don’t miss that. I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss the other stuff from time to time. I actually do miss the hours upon hours of dance practice, the horribly heavy stage makeup (think overdone Tammy Faye), the point shoes, tap shoes, et cetera. When I was dancing I was fit. I was by no means skinny, but I was fit.

With all that said, there is one thing that I did when I was younger that I didn’t lose in the process of growing up. My writing. I have written and I always will. That is my path in life (outside of the being a mom thing). It just took me a little bit to realize it.

It’s my outlet. Some things will make it into books, some won’t. But I write. I write to express myself. I write for my sanity. I write because sometimes I have something to say that can only come out on “paper”.

So that little girl so many years ago knew in her heart this is where she would end up. It just took her a bit to get here.


Blog Prompt: When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? What are you now? Are the two connected?

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