reflection

A lightbulb went on…

Recently a lightbulb went on in regards my dedication to my writing. I COULD BE MORE DEDICATED! I haven’t put nearly as much time and effort into my writing as I should. Now, don’t get me wrong. I write every day. I’m organized when it comes to my writing. I journal. I read books on writing. I edit – a lot. It isn’t enough.

I have all the support in the world from everyone who counts. I have the freedom to write since I stay home and my husband is working full time. I am also afforded the tools to write with as we are blessed to have the money to afford all the cool technology that I use in my writing process, we have two cars that can take me anywhere I want to write from, and my youngest who is still in school attends an online public school and I don’t have to worry about running him back and forth. I AM LUCKY.

So why don’t I do more?

Is it lack of confidence? Lack of motivation? I’m not sure. What I am sure about is that 2018 will be the year of improved dedication and productivity in regards to my writing career.

I will do what I need to do so that I can be who I want to be in the literary world. I will live up to that pinned tweet that I am so proud of and just updated.

I will stop saying yes just because I think that I should. I will stop feeling obligated to use a certain software or tool because a friend suggested it, I purchased it in the past and feel guilty not using it (this is huge for me especially when my husband buys me things like this), and I will stay healthy so that I don’t lose any days in this whole crazy process we authors call our love.

I have realized that writing for a living and doing what I love is not glamorous, it’s not something that is going to get me rich quick (actually realized this a long time ago), and that there will be hard times on the journey. I realize that there will be days that I just don’t want to write, and instead, what to sit and watch Netflix all day while cuddling with my pit bull. There will be days when that happens – I’m not going to lie about that – but on those days I will still write something while I enjoy a slower pace for that day. If you had an adorable little fur baby like I do, you would totally agree with me on that last point.

Last, but not least, I will believe in myself. I will let others believe in me. I will not quit.

Sayre

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